Why do we do this to ourselves? If we are old enough to at least be out of high school and beyond adolescent angst, we should know how futile it is to do battle with demons whose only power is what we allow them to have.
And yet ... I can feel the paralysis beginning. The bottom of my right foot feels like its on fire and there is a mild tic beneath my left eye. The foot-thingy may be neuropathy and the tic-thingy may be Bell's Palsy. The mental paralysis itself (yes, it's all in my head) is not serious enough to warrant a diagnosis. It is, however, serious enough for me to take note of its onset and to think about an appropriate treatment plan. These "symptoms" are really just a physical acknowledgment of the fact that I'm feeling a wee overload of stressors.
Having recently been diagnosably ill, I feel like I have lost one entire week of my life and a second week has been reduced by the fatigue of getting over the first week. My students have less than half a semester remaining to fully benefit from my amazing instruction. I anticipated having several chapters of my Great American Novel written by the end of this week. Add the fact that I intend to move in less than a month (having a whole bunch of crap to unload or move with me) and I have stirred up a nice batch of demons.
In reality, most of these demons are bearers of good news disguised as demons. The good news is that I am recovering from a non-life-threatening illness; the semester is more than half completed; I have been writing more in 2009 than in previous years; and I am moving away from my neighbor-from-hell to a lovely, peaceful spot on a lake where I can de-stress on a daily (moment-to-moment) basis.
The treatment plan for dealing with the demons is the same one that I have known about for many years.
1. Change how you think and you will change how you feel.
2. Count your blessings.
3. Breathe deeply.
4. Know that this too shall pass.
5. Having done all that is possible, let a Higher Power do the rest.
Last but not least, share the blessings with others.
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